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12-16-2007, 09:47 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| MODERATOR BY DAY / NINJA BY NIGHT GCB Senior Citizen   Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: A Padded Cell
Posts: 2,735
Rep Power: 46  | WHAT WOMEN WANT... When they first start dating 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3. Financially successful 4. A caring listener 5. Witty 6. In good shape 7. Dresses with style 8. Appreciates finer things 9. Full of thoughtful surprises 10. Imaginative, romantic lover What Women Want in a Man When they are age 32 1. Nice looking (hair on his head) 2. Opens car doors, holds chairs 3. Has enough money for a nice dinner 4. Listens more than talks 5. Laughs at my jokes 6. Carries bags of groceries with ease 7. Owns at least one tie 8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal 9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries 10. Seeks romance at least once a week What Women Want in a Man When they are age 42 1. Not too ugly 2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car 3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally 4. Nods head when I'm talking 5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes 6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture 7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach 8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids 9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down 10. Shaves most weekends What Women Want in a Man When they are age 52 1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed 2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public 3. Doesn't borrow money too often 4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting 5. Doesn't retell the same joke too many times 6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends 7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear 8. Appreciates a good TV dinner 9. Remembers your name on occasion 10. Shaves some weekends What Women Want in a Man When they are age 62 1. Doesn't scare small children 2. Remembers where bathroom is 3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep 4. Only snores lightly when asleep 5. Remembers why he's laughing 6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself 7. Usually wears some clothes 8. Likes soft foods 9. Remembers where he left his teeth 10. Remembers that it's the weekend What Women Want in a Man When they are age 72 1. Breathing 2. Doesn't miss the toilet
__________________ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- www.myspace.com/cherry_bomb_productions www.myspace.com/octavedownband नमस्ते THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A TRAIL OF BLOOD TO HELP YOU FIND YOUR WAY BACK HOME!!! 7  |
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12-16-2007, 09:48 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| MODERATOR BY DAY / NINJA BY NIGHT GCB Senior Citizen Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: A Padded Cell
Posts: 2,735
Rep Power: 46 | WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GET... Men are like placemats. They only show up when there's food on the table. Men are like mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like bike helmets. They are handy in an emergency, but otherwise they just look silly. Men are like government bonds. They take so long to mature. Men are like parking spots. The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped. Men are like copiers. You need them for reproduction, but that's about it. Men are like lava lamps. Fun to look at, but not very bright. Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest. Men are like high heels. They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it. Men are like curling irons. They're always hot, and they're always in your hair. Men are like mini skirts. If you're not careful, they'll creep up your legs.
__________________ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- www.myspace.com/cherry_bomb_productions www.myspace.com/octavedownband नमस्ते THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A TRAIL OF BLOOD TO HELP YOU FIND YOUR WAY BACK HOME!!! 7 |
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12-16-2007, 09:58 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
| MODERATOR BY DAY / NINJA BY NIGHT GCB Senior Citizen Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: A Padded Cell
Posts: 2,735
Rep Power: 46 | THE CRYING HUSBAND... A woman woke in the middle of the night to find her husband missing from their bed. In the stillness of the house, she could hear a muffled sound downstairs. She went downstairs and looked around, still not finding her husband. Listening again, she could definitely hear moaning. She went down to the basement to find her husband, crouched in the corner facing the wall, sobbing. "What's wrong with you?" she asked him. "Remember when your father caught us together when you were 16?" he replied. "And remember, he said, I had two choices - I could either marry you, or spend the next 20 years in prison." Baffled, she said, "Yes, I remember. So?" "I would have gotten out today."
__________________ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- www.myspace.com/cherry_bomb_productions www.myspace.com/octavedownband नमस्ते THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A TRAIL OF BLOOD TO HELP YOU FIND YOUR WAY BACK HOME!!! 7 |
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12-19-2007, 10:19 PM
| #6 (permalink) |
| Band Member GCB Senior Citizen  Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: wemo
Posts: 2,376
Rep Power: 14 | if pussy grew on trees there would be open season on them.
__________________ Straight Shots Myspace page My Myspace Bass page email ME for Straight Shot booking information. “Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.” James Dean |
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